I have yet to meet a parent or coach that enjoys Club Soccer Tryouts. Tryout season is far and away the most stressful time of the club year and it turns usually otherwise rational people into crazy folk. It is a natural, albeit disturbing situation, but understandable as parents and players want to make sure that they have a spot on a roster when the music stops and Coaches have to balance filling up rosters too early against not having enough of the right players to fill out a roster. Coaches and parents alike don’t want to “miss out” on that special player or that perfect fit and they all sort of hold each other hostage during the process.
Anxiety rises and coaches and parents often make rash decisions on the spur of the moment out of fear, decisions that often have long term (certainly season long) implications. Players that are shoo-ins to make the team or players that are longshots and just “hoping” to make a team usually suffer the least. The kids that are in the middle can really be tied up emotionally in the process. To coaches, some of these kids appear to be “fungible” but to the players and families, they are anything but fungible.
This is all layered on top of the fact that most of the young players should likely still be playing 4 v 4 and not 7 v 7 and really should not be traveling at all, but no one wants to get left behind, so it is a powerful draw.
You may be asking yourself, are they really tryouts? The simple answer is “well sort of.” At the young ages when teams are being formed, the answer is likely yes, is your player ready for club or not, it is sort of binary. At the older ages, most players that come to the tryouts are club ready, but it is just a matter of finding the right level, team, or position for them. These older teams usually established, have a track record and only looking for 3-4 players in certain positions. So it is a very different ball game when they get older, as they are not building entire rosters.
Entering the tryout season, everyone should have the right mindset and create expectations correctly.
Parent Considerations
Parents should keep these things in mind when going through the tryout process:
- Higher is not always better. I am often confounded by parents that want the “top flight” team for their child, regardless of whether or not that is the right team for their child. It is important to remember that having a club decal and being able to say your kid plays on a flight 1 team may not be what is best for the development of your child. I have seen a lot of kids with a ton of potential that end up on a team that is not right for them and they burn out early or just don’t develop, because they don’t get to play.
- Tryouts are a snapshot in time of the player, the tryout measures the player right now. Tryouts are not games, and often just a 1 v 1 or 2 v 2 setting which can’t really display the player’s upside. Getting into a good program with the ability to move up or down depending on the player should be the goal. Coaches often make an initial judgment about a player that may not be correct, the tryout is just not the end all be all for player selection and fit.
- Additionally, talking your player up to the coach may actually have the opposite effect. If the coach does not see what you told them they would see, you may have just set the player backward. The coach had very high expectations, and then those expectations were not met, while if the coach had an open mind about the player it may have gone differently.
- Setbacks are an important part of life. Let the player earn their spot, if you get them on a team they should not be on, what lesson are they learning? The stories of individuals who overcame adversity to become great are so numerous that they don’t need to be recounted, but everyone knows the Michael Jordan story, enough said. Get the kid in a good environment where they can grow.
- Don’t become confrontational regarding honest feedback, provided that feedback is provided in a caring, empathetic way that focuses on the development of the player and what is in that player’s best interest. Players being around their peers is the best for the vast majority of players. Don’t ride your player on the drive home about the performance at the tryout and that they “blew” it and now won’t make the team that you want them to make. Don’t let your player know you may be personally disappointed. Focus on effort, did they try their best? I know it has been said countless times, but parental pressure usually has the opposite effect on the player, the more pressure the less fun and poorer performance.
- Soccer is not linear, at times you have to go back to go forward. Often growth occurs in leaps and bounds, you may see a lack of development and then a real jump forward. So just because you end up on a certain team for a year does not mean that is where you are resigned to stay for the rest of their playing career.
Coaches and Administrator Considerations:
- Tryouts are very stressful to parents and kids. Set a realistic tryout environment and build in some time for someone from the club to talk with parents. You may need to have extra coaches out there to support. The worst thing for parents and players a like is to leave a tryout and be like, “now what” and no one from the Club ever got back to them.
- Coaches should not be talking about players with other coaches in ear shot of players or parents. Have a good system so you can identify players and discuss placement of players after the tryout.
- Have definitive timelines for when you will be reaching out to players and parents to let them know what you are thinking.
- Be honest in communications. Care about the players that did not make it and tell them why. Give the players that did not make it a path to come back next year. A plan to continue to play and improve is important. Many times that is just playing recreationally and waiting a year to grow, other times it is private training or even enough club where they can play.
- Players have choices, youth soccer is very diluted today and if you want to pay to play, a player that is not the right fit for you can likely find a home somewhere else. Honest communication is important as all coaches owe it to the players to give them that honest feedback.
I don’t have a better answer right now, but I am constantly thinking about how to improve the process. But once you are through it and you find that great team that feels like home, it is all worth it!
In Part II we will lay out the basic framework for the tryout process and some tips to consider when going through it. Please subscribe so you don’t miss anything!
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