Below is a basic framework for the tryout and some tips to reduce the stress for parents and players.

Tryouts: The Basics 

The basic premise of the tryout is simple, evaluate players to see if they are a good fit for the team.  It becomes a lot more complicated in reality because soccer is so subjective, tryouts are not games, a tryout is often a snapshot in time, it is impossible to evaluate team chemistry in the tryout environment, and you really don’t get to know a player in an hour or two session.

Tryouts: Club Specifics 

You need to know a little about the club you are trying out for.  What do they stand for?  Are they an “elite” club focussed on winning? Are they a grassroots club focused on player development?  Are they a club that has a developmental program and elite teams? What are they looking for?  Do they only grab the most athletic players and play over the top?  Do they value  possession and highly technical players?  Do they take anyone that they think they can make into a player?  Do they promote from within or do they only recruit new players for their top teams?  How many kids are they getting onto High School Teams?  Do they put kids into colleges?  Are the kids having  fun?  Do those things matter to you?

Clubs have reputations, some deserved and some not, but doing a little research into the club and  coaches can save  you a lot of heartache down the line.  Be wary of Clubs that just have a “name” or teams that wear a brand for status and coaches that are there for the paycheck.  There are so many clubs and coaches out there  – you should do some due diligence before you come to the tryout.

Tryouts: Expectations 

You should  expect your  player  to be evaluated and you should expect feedback from the club about where your player fits (or does not fit) in the club’s plan or program.

Tryouts: Tips 

1. Prepare your child for the tryout or don’t…  It depends on the kid.  I prefer to look at tryouts as just another practice for my kids.  Even when my daughters were trying out for high school, I was always hopeful, but just treating it like a practice is usually the best plan. A practice session will give the coach the best data points to make a selection.  As a coach, there is nothing worse than a player who is on their  best behavior and maximum effort at the tryout and then once they make the team, they  are a completely different person.
2. Set your family priorities heading into the tryout, is it playing with friends? Is it playing time? Is it winning? Is it development? Is it being a leader?  Is it being a follower?  What is important to you? set these and stick to them, if you compromise on your values and priorities, you will usually regret it.
3. Research the Coaches, the Club, the  League, etc. know what you are getting into.  Spend some time to learn the lingo, and realize that you are a victim of your own experience. What you did playing club soccer 20-25 years ago will generally have little to no bearing on the current club situation. I see parents who think bout their childhood experience and try to apply that to being a parent, it usually is not helpful. Also, you may have been in an organization that handles things a certain way, so you may not be actually hearing what the members of this club are actually saying. Try to understand the following: What sort of people are you dealing with?  What are the coaches looking for? Do they just cut players and let them find their own way?  Do they help find new homes for players that they can’t take?  Do they like new players over existing players? Do they  make promises that they don’t keep?
4. Relax.   If you want your child to play, you can find a place to play.  If you are worried about status, then the tryouts will be even more stressful and your player will likely feel that stress. Letting the kids play should be the top priority and they will fall out where they fall out.

Tryouts: Parent and Player Emotions

Here are some common emotions at Tryout time and if you know to expect these, you can try to  deal with them as best  as possible.  

1. Worry –  Am I going  to make the team?  Is my logistical plan for practice and games about to be disrupted? Will I be on the right team?  Will I be with that “kid” or “family” that  we don’t get along  with.
2. Frustration  – I am on the team, why do I have to tryout
3. Guilt – because you are looking at another team or another club. This guilt applies to:
   1. Teammates
   2. The coach
   3. The other parents
4. Powerlessness – in today’s world parents control almost every aspect of their children’s lives, but tryouts illustrate a lack of control and that can create a new stress that many families are not accustomed to dealing with.
5. Pressure – the timeline to make these decisions is really tight

You  can only control what you can control, so focus on that.  Don’t  be part of the problem  for others,  the  worst thing you can do is go on social media and post that  “We got our offer!” or calling all the other parents to “find out” if they got their offers or not.  Ask questions of the coach and club and get comfortable as quickly as possible in the process and what that means for your player, but don’t make the process harder on the other players.  Waiting too long to get all of the information generally leads to regret.  Tryouts are the worst and for some of the younger kids come at the worst possible time – the Holidays!

Compounding the situation are those parents that can’t make a decision, maybe its because they are trying out at multiple clubs, or because they are not sure of what they want, or perhaps the player is not all that committed and they don’t want to spend the time and money, you just never know. Remember, it is a two way street and while you may be the “customer” this is not a simple financial transaction between you and the club or you and the coach. A team is just that, a team and everyone has to harmonize together to make it work! So when you don’t make a decision you are actually impacting anywhere from 7 to 15 other families, that is something that folks often forget in this process.

Do your research and know what you are looking for when you sign up for a tryout so you can make your decision on if it is a fit for your player, you and the family.

Please Subscribe Below!

Your Subscriptions matter – if you like the content you see – please subscribe so you don’t miss anything. This blog is a labor of love, so if you like the content – please shop using our amazon links or other adds you can even add MDT to your phone so you are one click away from amazon, instructions are here. If you are new to youth soccer, every team can use flipgive for fundraising, so check out our article here and please create your team using our code https://flipgive.app.link/r?code=889719! And we would love to see your team at the San Clemente Cup, held every August in Orange County, California.

Follow us on Instagram

www.instagram.com/moderndadtopics

www.instagram.com/havikco

https://www.instagram.com/sanclementecup/

As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases made by you via the Amazon link. These potential earnings make this website possible.

Visit the Modern Dad Topics Store here.